Winter Wonderland

Well I think most will agree with me that the holidays are so much sweeter when you have a special someone to share it with.  Im still seeing drummer boy and I have to say, things are going quite well.  Sometimes I even feel as if Im living through scenes of some of my favorite movies.  It quite nice.

photo courtesy of LIFE magazine

I've always felt that when you start dating someone and in some relationships, one person is always more 'into it' than the other.  One always feels a little bit (or a lot) stronger about the relationship.  This is totally true by the way, I can present several cases of friends and my own relationships that will attest to this.  Its been a while since I've been in a long term relationship but I would assume that these feelings level off at some point so that both people meet in the 'middle.'  I would hope so.  When i first started seeing drummer boy, I felt like we were on the same level and was stoked!  Gradually I started to feel like his interest was peaking a bit more than mine.  Which is great!  I mean come on, it's pretty nice to have the upper hand!  However, Im realizing this is a pretty amazing guy and I want us to be on the same level.  Im getting there, slowly letting go of some of my hangups.  But will we ever be on the same page?  I have to say, I think he might have sealed the deal for me with this KILLER mix tape he made me as part of my Christmas gift.  I could tell he put so much thought into it and it put a huge smile on my face.  I don't know how else to explain it, but something definitely changed for me in the last 24 hours.
So I guess you could say we're slowly meeting each other at that level.  As always, time will tell.

My next dilemma is how to handle the 'we met on a dating site' issue.  I mean, at my age people aren't necessarily having the 'will you be my girlfriend' conversation.  I think its more something that is just kind of assumed after a certain amount of time.  But i know talking to several of my girlfriends, we all feel some sort of conversation or agreement on exclusivity should be had.  I think this usually happens around the 2-3 month point, depending on how much time you have been spending together.  We women start to wonder if our man is talking to other girls, and one of the silliest but quite legit questions; How do I refer to him?  Is he my man, man friend, lover, guy Im dating, friend, or is he my boyfriend?  Hilarious, I know!  But any girl out there reading this will agree its a question that will run through our mind until its clarified.  Online dating makes this even more complicated.  Because the whole time you are dating, you both know that the both of your are on a dating site which is a Starbucks of single men and women.  You have access to all these people online 24-7.  You can be as picky as you want because there are so many choices.  Tall, grandé, extra sugar, dark, decaf, extra shot, bold brew, no whip.  The possibilities are endless!  Therefore I feel that especially when its a case where you met online; it needs to be established that neither of you are using the service anymore.  I realize this doesn't mean that either person isn't out at a bar chatting it up with some stranger.  But it certainly narrows the playing field.  In my case, Im not pushing for this conversation any time soon.  But I feel like it may be soon approaching.

Hope all you lovers out there get your new years kiss!  And a special shout out to one of our readers and a good friend, Stephanie.  Congratulations on your engagement!  Very happy for you both!

Are You Wearing... Transition Lens's?

Alright kids, here we go, my first date back in the game.  I had several lovely emails with The Italian Heart and was really looking forward to our first date.  Sadly this guy indulged in one of my pet peeves... not planning the date that you asked me on.  Sorry guys, but you asked the lady out, you should have something planned.  Especially on a first date.  Im the kind of gal that likes a guy to take initiative!  But I digress.  I suggested the Day of the Dead festival for our afternoon date being that is was Halloween weekend.
Bad choice.
I had never been and had no idea how crazy it was going to be.  It was worse than Disneyland, we could barely walk.  However all I could focus on was what appeared to be transition lens glasses on his face.  The sun was setting so the glasses couldn't figure out if they wanted to be light or dark.  You know who wears those?  My dad.  You know who shouldn't wear those, my date.
Conversation was good.  However there was something missing.  There was no draw.  We had talked about getting together again which I was unsure about but went along with.  Might give him another try, considering the date location was so awful.  But the next day I was sure that a second try was unnecessary.  After all, I was paying for a dating service, I think I get to be as picky as I want.  Unfortunately I had bought a mirror for my sister that night and left it in his car.  I debated sucking it up through a second date to get the mirror back.  But, it was only $25 and quite frankly I'd rather not waste either of our time.
Lesson learned: Dont plan first dates in crowded areas.  Also, people can be better or worse in person compared to their photos.  Just keep this in mind.  Thats all!

Giving it Another Shot

So, I was chatting with a couple of my single gals over superbowl beers about online dating. Now as we know, I have never had too much success with this. But after hearing some of my friends voctorious meetings from interdudes I was considering giving it another try.

About a week ago I decided to try with Match again. After realizing that $60 was too much for me to shell out I cancelled, but not before I talked to a couple guys. As usual nothing grabbed me. Last weekend me and the girls decided we were all going to try eHarmony together. We all felt it was the better choice and that guys on that site are more 'serious' than match guys. Where we came up with this rediculous conclusion, I have no idea.

So a few days ago I signed up. Remarkably I found a discount code that got me 3 months for only $30. I was amazed, and thrilled. Over the last couple days I have got a ton of matches and am talking to a few. I figure if anything it will make for some great stories for the blog world.

Stay tuned...