I'll Take One Second Date Please!

I don't get it. What is so hard about planning date #2. And since when do men just assume that date #2 will happen? I swear I had to twist Comic Book Guys arm to get plans for date 2 going.

Sure, I understand that we both have acknowledged that we like each other, but that doesn't mean date 2 is going to plan itself! And here's a tip if you are going to date me... take some initiative! Take control! Tell me where we are going, when, and what to wear! Maybe not the last bit but I absolutely hate guys who want you to make all the decisions. CBG better have something good planned. I have high hopes...

Cut It Out

One of my first guest writings on this blog was about the inordinate amount of ex boyfriends at my birthday party. I was just short of proud at the fact that I had sustained the relationships for as long as I had, even though some of them ended badly. But, last week I got a reality check.

He and I had dated in a long ago and far away land called high school, but we have known each other since the seventh grade. We were the perfect argument to the theory that opposites attract. It was messy, and he has shown me on countless occasions, in hundreds of ways that he is incapable of caring about anyone other than himself, at least in a relationship. Somehow I still found a way to forgive him throughout the years, even though I lacked this strength with other friendships. But now I'm done.

We hadn't had a real social outing together in well over a year. He was high when he picked me up, took Xanax when we got to his friend's apartment, smoked more, and then got drunk. He left me to drive him and his car home, while he passed out in the passenger seat. He refused to fill up the gas tank, and, like I predicted, we ended up on the side of the 101 freeway. I had to call AAA at 3:30 in the morning and tell them I had run out of gas. So yes, I was angry; actually I was furious. He knew this, and said to me, without hesitation "I don't give a fuck what you think, how you feel, or what you do." And then the battery died; I warned him about this too but he said it couldn't happen so fast. And with that, it was over. When the car died, my care for him, my compassion, my empathy died along with it.

It was the night from hell, but I don't regret it. I believe that regrets are what results from being hurt and not learning from it. But I learned that, sometimes, you have to cut people out. I have never consciously ended relationships before, it just occurs naturally sometimes. Some people just aren't good for you; he isn't Carrie's Mr. Big; he isn't even the one who got away; he's nothing but a complete and utter asshole. And that's the end.

My first date!

Well I just can't stop smiling today!
It is a pleasant surprise when you end up on your first eHarmony date and it turns out just fabulous! I have to say, after talking to this guy, who has been dubbed comic book; I was actually excited for this date! I haven't acted this girly in a while. I was feeling great the whole day but then about 5 minutes before I was supposed to leave to meet for happy hour, I got sooo nervous! But as expected 10 minutes in, the convo was flowing, I had a cocktail, and things were fine.
I haven't had this giddy feeling in a while and I have to say, it's rather nice! Sure its not that hard to find a decent looking guy with a good job online.. but the chemistry is what makes it!! And let me tell you.. it was there! I never realized until last night that being smart is a total turn on! Love it!

We'll see who is the hero in this comic book!

I just threw up in my mouth a little

This is not dating related. But since I haven't started my 'nasty ho's' blog, I had to post here...

So last night I go to a local show for this band I like. I'm not quite sure how I even recognized her but crack face Jael from America's Next Top Model was there. I instantly cringed when I first saw this person. It took me a few minutes to realize it was the crazy looks/sounds like a man loser from ANTM. This she-man makes you feel the need to shower. I dont know how many drugs she was on but she was tore up!!

Later after the band performed I was in the bar and all of a sudden saw her start to brawl with this sweet asian girl! Jael flew at her out of nowhere and punched her in the face. After that the horrendous shit talk came out of her mouth which is too rediculous and disgusting to even repeat. I dont know what her problem was but this chick with a dick is the nastiest thing I have seen in a long time. She looks as low class as it gets. She probably has crabs in her mustache. If you ever see this beast.. beware she may try and spit some herpes in your face for no reason.

It’s better to have loved and lost….

Psychologically, our minds want to relive things, make similar choices and decisions whether they have had a positive outcome in the past or not. Why? Because our brains are more comfortable repeating patterns than starting something new. We’re more likely to start a new relationship if we’ve had a failed one rather than never having one at all. This is where serial daters, long-term dating loops, and other related terms begin to make sense.

Me? I’m a relationship girl. I’ve been doing it since I was 14, and it seems to be what my brain, my heart, and my body feel comfortable doing. Even though I finally felt strong and rather kick ass over a month ago for having felt good about being single, my heart skips a beat when I imagine the alternatives and the possibilities. So, perhaps it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all, because at least you will be more likely to love again.

Hello, internet dating? There's been a mistake!

Oh what's that? There wasnt a mix up you say?? It seems like every time I meet a new female on the internet, they are the greatest thing since sliced bread. They are funny, endearing, and they can hold a conversation without saying anything completely retarded. And then, we get to the in-person date; the crucible, if you will. Suddenly the amazing person you met online is but a mere husk of a person. Was her brain erased before she made it out to the restaurant ? Did she tragically lose her sense of humor in an accident? It seems like when the date finally begins, she expects me to do all the work and be funny, and take the helm of the conversation. It just feels like one is on a date with a completely new person; I understand that there is the initial tension of meeting someone face to face for the first time, but after twenty minutes of a girl sitting quietly making me put in all the effort....I can only care so much to keep the effort going. Dates need to be on an equal ground, where both parties can be comfortable and able to converse with each other uninterrupted by third parties. I guess dating, and especially internet dating is like a war; every date is a new battleground with a new enemy, and the whole time you're trying to push forward to get in their foxhole. But sometimes you just have to ask yourself: can there be a treaty, or is it just time to drop the big one? War is hell. But I'd rather get shot in the leg than go on one more boring ass date.

-CupCake Bandit

"It's hot, the butter in my pocket is melting!"

Let's Just Be Friends

A few months ago, I started thinking about a few of my guy friends and the men I surround myself with. It's a pretty good mix, but something was glaring at me; there has been a lot of sexual chemistry between a lot of them (and me, not each other... just to clarify). One of my ex-boyfriends is one of my best friends, hands down. Although we have both moved on to date other people, there are moments when it becomes horribly obvious that he hasn't healed and I have my own attachment problems. Another good friend fits this description too, but the friendships keep truckin' because I'd rather have them in my life awkwardly then not at all.

But other than ex-flames, this single girl has now become to question whether or not platonic friendships are even possible. Some odd confessions have been made to me; drunk or sober, they're confessions nonetheless. I have at least one best friend who I know I'll never have to deal with this with, God willing. It doesn't just jeopardize the friendship, it freaks us out and makes us wonder what signs we have been missing.

And just a thought, when people pick out lobsters at a seafood restaurant, aren't they kind of playing God?

Giving it Another Shot

So, I was chatting with a couple of my single gals over superbowl beers about online dating. Now as we know, I have never had too much success with this. But after hearing some of my friends voctorious meetings from interdudes I was considering giving it another try.

About a week ago I decided to try with Match again. After realizing that $60 was too much for me to shell out I cancelled, but not before I talked to a couple guys. As usual nothing grabbed me. Last weekend me and the girls decided we were all going to try eHarmony together. We all felt it was the better choice and that guys on that site are more 'serious' than match guys. Where we came up with this rediculous conclusion, I have no idea.

So a few days ago I signed up. Remarkably I found a discount code that got me 3 months for only $30. I was amazed, and thrilled. Over the last couple days I have got a ton of matches and am talking to a few. I figure if anything it will make for some great stories for the blog world.

Stay tuned...

Beware Facebook Friending!

What is it with meeting crazy creeper guys? Not sure if i mentioned 'security' whom i met on new years when i was working. He wanted to go out and I politely told him I was seeing someone. He seemed fine with this. My mistake was accepting his friend request on facebook. He starts i-ming me every time I'm online. Not to mention always asking if i'm 'still with my guy' and even going as far as saying how lucky this guy must be and that he bets I'm crazy in the sack... WHAT??!!? I dont even know you!! Seriously.. major creeps!! I immediately deleted him from friends. Careful when you go to skybar.